after scouring the internet for leads on how to end my reign as yahoo pool champion bum extraordinaire, i have three simultaneous voices ringing in my head. should i go down with the master plan and pawn my soul to the white collar sweatshops? it would be interesting to see what amount they'd put over my head, whether i was prime cut selling at a premium or disposable dog meat. quite honestly though that would come as a side dish because i have other reasons why i'd pawn myself to the financial district. i'm using that as leverage to break myself into bigger, more important fields.
that second voice sings that i should jet my ass out of any comfort zones i'm in, and travel to another far flung country where i can maximize the adventurous spirit my youth can afford to give me (read: no responsibilities, no family to feed, no nothing). just another brave new world to conquer. or am i just polluting myself with reasons to go to japan? seriously though, i could use another overdose of long-term culture shock. say no to drugs, yes to travelling.
in the back of my mind toys an idea of working for a non-profit org, or possibly even volunteer work. mostly though, i just want to make a difference. if not in other people's lives, making a difference in my own is enough - meaning i don't exist just to go through the motions of a 'life'. i want to know that i'm awake not because i wokeup this morning, but i'm awake because there's something i have to do, i have a reason, i have a purpose. and if there's something i need to do right now, its to shut the hell up and go to bed. so much for my analogies. i'm crossing my fingers, there's a big road ahead.